The Good Time Vampire Escort Service

Dwayne Stacey isn't your ordinary former Super Bowl MVP-turned-suave-handsome-vampire fifty years after Flu-V nearly decimated the population of Earth. No, Dwayne is a man on a mission, and that mission is to convince the football bigwigs at the Vince Lombardi Gala and Silent Auction that a Vampire Football League is where it's at. His agent at the Good Time Vampire Escort Service has gotten him a ticket to the event, and he suspects this may be his last shot at the goal.
Because if he doesn't increase his income soon, he and his super intelligent cat are going to lose their preferred standard of living, or unliving, as it were. Not only that, but since his preferred standard of living includes a pitchfork-wielding-mob proof security system, he might lose a lot more than his fine digs. Vampires can't be too careful in a world of humans who are struggling to accept them, but what would make a guy more acceptable than being a football superstar once again?