The Devil's Gunt

Hi, I'm Rick. AKA, Beelzebub. AKA, Mephistopheles. AKA, Old Hat. AKA, Mr. Scratch. AKA... AKA... AKA. You may think of me as the Father of Lies, but for the record, I'm also the Daddy of Mammon and Steve. But both of them are b-holes. In fact, all my hellspawn are. So, I got this idea. I wanted to have a kiddo with a human. I had it all lined up for this adult film star to carry my seed, except the demon who shall remain unnamed screwed up and impregnated the wrong person.
A male wrong person. And now I'm gonna have to go up there to fix this mistake myself. But, it's going to be a chore. He's got a wife who is pretty savvy, and I think his roommate is a serial killer (Hey, I'm only half omnipotent!). I guarantee you, though, I'm gonna see my junior before this tale is done. If I have to eff every bee in the City of Detroit and Wayne County, my little one will be born - or my name isn't Louis Cyphre, or Sy Tan, or Deb Billings, or Burl Ives...