Patricia Marie Krentcil, a.k.a. "Tan Mom" is a mother of five beautiful children. She is known around the world today as a tanning superstar extraordinaire, an ex-model, a music icon, a fashionista, a reality TV star, a Wack Packer and at times a gigantic trainwreck. She is a rabid tanning bed enthusiast when she is not sunbathing, applying bronzer, drinking a wine or three, fighting in celebrity boxing matches or running for Offices she will never hold. In her spare time, Patricia enjoys boating, skiing and many other things that we are not legally allowed to mention in a book jacket.
Joseph P.
Kerr is an avid indoorsman. With an extreme allergy for rocks and asphalt, Mr. Kerr has been unable to leave his home for decades. Joseph is a big fan of shaving his neighbor's dog and collecting other people's toenails when he is fortunate enough to be able to have someone carry him to their car and take him places where there are no rocks or pavement. In his spare time, Joseph enjoys mowing his carpet, watering his linoleum, and eating lead paint chips.
Since no one will ever read this, he doesn't really give a shit what it says.
Kerr is an avid indoorsman. With an extreme allergy for rocks and asphalt, Mr. Kerr has been unable to leave his home for decades. Joseph is a big fan of shaving his neighbor's dog and collecting other people's toenails when he is fortunate enough to be able to have someone carry him to their car and take him places where there are no rocks or pavement. In his spare time, Joseph enjoys mowing his carpet, watering his linoleum, and eating lead paint chips.
Since no one will ever read this, he doesn't really give a shit what it says.