Released. Caged, #3

Oblivion is a sweet, sweet place. No pain. No disturbing thoughts of the past. No guilt from my recent actions. Deep down, there is still a part of me that knows how screwed up I am.  I don't see a way out, not now.  Tria's gone, and the possibility of her forgiving me in my current state is exactly zero.  I know I have to pull myself together, accept my responsibilities, and try to make amends, but I have no idea where to start.
No job. No apartment.  I'm living on the streets with the other junkies.  As little as I had to offer Tria before, I have nothing to give her now.  The only way out is to come clean and tell Tria the truth about my past, but the idea of reliving the memories is so painful, I can't think about it long enough to figure out a solution. I've hit rock bottom, and I don't even know which way is up any more.