Ryan Collison

Your love life is a prediction engine. Every fight that came out of nowhere, every partner who felt like home for the wrong reasons, every pattern you swore you'd broken and then ran again; that's not a character flaw. That's a nervous system doing exactly what it was trained to do. This book wires together three frameworks that have never been synthesized for a general audience: Karl Friston's active inference (the math of how your brain predicts everything), Stephen Porges' polyvagal theory (the neuroscience of why your body keeps score), and Donald Winnicott's object relations (the clinical tradition that understood what "good enough" actually means).
The result is a unified model of why you love the way you love, why you suffer the way you suffer, and what it actually takes to change the pattern. Not a diagnosis. Not a thirty-day plan. A lens that, once you see through it, you can't unsee.